Weekend Rush

Don't let smiley guy fool ya. He looks relaxed and happy by the water...probably on the beach or something... I just like the picture, its not a reflection of my current position. :) Its been a busy weekend!!! I'm smiling, I'm happy but it hasn't been relaxing at all!!!
Tuesday at my Spanish class I have to do a little mini speech describing myself and one family member .. and I chose Paul. ....
Here it is:

Mi llama Libby. Yo soy optimista y alegre. Yo no timida. Estoy muy ocupada pero no cansada.

Yo tengo ojos verdes y pelo rubia y estoy alta. Tambien, yo tengo gordas pies.

Mi esposo se llama Paul. El es muy muy muy muy guapo y amable. El tiene ojos azules y es alto con pelo blanco. El es activo y muy tranquilo y muy muy muy trabajador.

I am not real sure how to say all the words ...I'm slow and choppy but i'm learning!!!!

I love this little short thing...its so true really... it reminds me of the Bible verse that sais your treasure is where your heart is...

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.

One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

Super Charge

I woke up and saw Annah's big purple play cell phone on my charger and spewed out my coffee as a smile of laughter forged itself upon my face...

...and in that order: wake up, pour coffee, eyes begin to focus...

Ideally, my coffee pot would be right next to the bed and I would get it into my veins before getting out of bed but that just won't happen because I would probably fall back to sleep holding the cup while sitting up in bed and then spill it...I force myself out of bed, stumble down the stairs and pour the remote controlled coffee... and then open my eyes and see the big purple phone on my charger... spew the coffee from laughing.

Today was a great day...I had Spanish and memorized the Spanish alphabet and can count to a million and successfully say my age correctly. Cuarenta y cuatro.

Paul has been marvelous and has been looking up job positions in New Mexico as come to find out, I discovered a few Raytheons in NM close to the border of Mexico...although ideally, just like having my coffee pot next to the bed...ideally we would move to Costa Rica or Panama and do missions work with our son Alan. As I posted in another blog, I'm always asked "Why do you want to go, why don't you stay here, there is plenty of work to do here in America, right here'...... Weeelllll, because there are also plenty of Christian Americans right here to do the plenty of work here who can't leave the country, can't get away, can't GO and there are not enough THERE to do the work so going seems like the very right thing to do because we can go, want to go so it seems like a good match! :)

"Teach us, good Lord, to serve Thee as Thou deservest; to give, and not to count the cost, to fight, and not to heed the wounds, to toil, and not to seek for rest, to labor, and not to ask for any reward, save that of knowing that we do Thy will through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen" - Ignatius of Antioch.

Small Smiles

This is a little one minute clip of a worship part at the orphanage.... I was focused on what Ami was saying and then she began singing and then I heard the door open and I turned to see with the camera still as my eyes and then the littlest face with the biggest smile ever greeted my camera face...it literally brought tears to my eyes... seriously.

The Wonder of Mechanical Pencils

I have discovered mechanical pencils. Although they were invented in 1820, I am just now discovering them. I have never used one before now. It all happened in New Mexico. I discovered in the car trip to the orphanage that to my horror I did not have a pencil to do my Sudoku puzzles. We stopped at Walmarts to get some thangs and can you believe it....they didn't have any pencils. But they did have mechanical pencils which I never thought were real pencils... I just didn't. I know they say they are but I just didn't think so. My friend convinced me to buy them and thus I did and there was indeed an instant love connection.

.... although there is a drawback. Its actually a rather large drawback. As I was feverishly taking notes with my super cool papermate mechanical pencil in my super hard beginning Spanish class, when I went to twist up more led.... to my shock and horror...(obviously I am terrorized easily) when I twisted it there was no more led. I had no idea I was ledless. Utterly ledless. Fortunately I had a pen in my purse. Thats not typcial for me. I never really know what I have in my purse... maybe there could of been a pen, maybe not. Had I not had one I would of just died right there in the class because I am miss front row. I mean, I take all the notes... and the guy next to me takes none. But thats probably because he already knows all this stuff. I mean, he's what... 19 and had 2 years of Spanish right?????? I'm like Cuatro y Cuatro and am clueless. And I know Cuatro y Cuatro isn't right to define my age because when the teacher asked me and thats how I answered she kinda laughed a bit and corrected me... not sure how to say my age. Million or something. I don't know.
This is our dog 'Izzy' according to Annah. :)

God is good all the time.
All The Time!

The first day of class

I began my college Spanish class today. Wow. I was worried that because it was a beginner class that I would just know it all... oh my gosh. I walked in facing a lab of computers... I double checked to make sure I was in a Spanish class... "yes, sit down and go to the Spanish folder and play around until the instructor gets here".... sooooo, I held my head high, sat down at the first computer I saw and pretended to know exactly what to do. I had no idea. I clicked on a folder that said Spanish... soooo, which thingie do I go into...Dos Mundos 5, or 6 or something else???? Lets try 5... but then I overheard the fill in instructer tell someone to go into 6.... and it was all in Spanish...

......so then the instructor gets here... talks with that real fast talk.... forget just learning colors and numbers...no.... she was asking us questions and using full blown phrases and what I learned today was that most of my classmates are kids out of highschool who had Spanish classes and this is a beginning Spanish class at an Academic college level and I am probably way behind all of them.

.... I learned that I have a very Texas accent and I am slow to speak.... I pause alot. I do this because I always try to think about what I am about to say because I am notorious and I do mean notorious for saying the wrong thing.... so I am pretty careful about what I say and therefore I usually think before each word and each word has a bit of Texas in it.... this does not go well with fast speaking Spanish persons.... she asked me what my name was in Spanish and I know how to ask what a persons name is and I know how to say my name etc...but when she says it...it was SO fast that I couldn't process it fast enough to answer fast enough.... I bet to her it sounds like "Meeeeee l l aaammmaaaaa Liiiiiiibbbbbbbbyyyyyyy" Sloowww and TXan. Next, I went to the bookstore to get my books and got a total cost of 3x what my class cost and thats with my textbook being Used. I'm not really grumbling or complaining... I actually kinda have a lopsided grin on my face at the wonder of it all... I mean...I am truly in wonder... kinda in awe of the whole experience. My class is going to be really difficult and my books cost more than my class. Wow. This is really amazing. I am living the dream! :)

I drove home pleading with God to make my brain work. I tried to remind Him about the Tower of Babel and how He miraculously gave them all different and new languages so surely He could give me one .... specifically Spanish.

I can do this. :)

"The strength of a man consists in finding out the way God is going, and going that way." - Henry Ward Beecher

Molly

In the midst of the 70,000 lives already lost in Haiti is beautiful 22 year old, Molly Mackenzie Hightower from Washington. Molly was volunteering since June at an orphanage in Haiti. Her body was found in the orphanage rubble. Fortunately a friend who was visiting her escaped alive.
You can read more about her journey and about her here at her blogspot.

Like many others, I feel like fleeing to Haiti to reach out and try to help. I know that money donations at this time is the best I am allowed to do. But I want to be there. I want to hold on to people. I want to hold the children.

I watched tonight on 60 minutes about the American doctors trying to improvise in the primitive of conditions.... they showed them using a hacksaw to saw of a child's leg. They were doing this in moderate to no lighting as the generator would come and go. The doctor said he wanted people to 'see' what is going on...he asks for us to not just go on with our lives but to see what is happening... to help. Sadly, many supplies are bottle necked and unable to get to them. They only had 3 small bottles left of rubbing alcohol to sterilize the saws and other equally "Rusty" equipment. Someone brought them vodka to which he said that would work. It seems in addition to water, food, more and more supplies they need hands to help but its just not that possible to get there without being somebody specifically ... a friend of mine just graduated from nursing school but not even she is qualified yet to be able to go and do what she can. Its understandable of course...but I still wish I could be there. I feel so useless just sitting here while there is this huge tragedy going on and so much work to be done there. I want to be digging, holding, something.

Talking to God

The other night as we were praying before bed, Annah was saying her prayers and all the sudden the dogs began barking rather ferociously. Without hesitation she continued her prayer like this:

"God, would you please go outside and see why the dogs are barking and God, please don't slam the door.
God, can you come out to play? We could play hopscotch, ring around the rosy, play on the swing and the trampoline...but your kinda big..."

It just tickled me. :-)

Reckless Faith - Let Go and Be Led

I just read this book by Beth Guckenberger called "Reckless Faith".... SO ironically it is about a young couple (Beth and Todd Guckenberger) who left their life here to become missionaries to orphans in Mexico. I picked this book up at the library before I went to the orphanage because I liked the title without knowing what it was about. I read this book within a day. It was very moving.
Here is one of the stories from the book as told by Beth... its amazing...I hope you like it:

Reckless Faith - Beth Guckenberger - Joel's Story

Zondervan | MySpace Video

Getting my hair done

The first night at the Los Palomas orphanage my hair was overtaken by the little girls. They rapidly took out ever hair tie and began to recreate my hair style.

Back from Mexico... Knot in my heart

This is Dedisito. Dedisito is actually a girl but they do not have any girl clothes to fit her so she was always dressed in little boy outfits. She is one of a sibling group of 5 in the Los Palomas orphanage. Her father and older brother were shot and killed about 7 months ago as a 'hit'. Her mother was unable to care for the 5 children and brought them to the orphanage. Dedisito was probably around 7 months old. I estimate she is about 14 months of age now.

I admit, as usual after returning home... I feel speechless. Shocked. Burdened. Sad. I don't want to be here. I want to be there. The need is so tremendous. When I was there, as I held a weeping 9 year old girl...actually it was Dedisito's older sister, as she was sobbing because "Quiro mama" which means "I want my mama".... I was weeping with her and my heart and my whole being was encompassed in the compassion and mercy that God feels towards these children. I spent the past week being encompassed in where God's heart is and I could feel it. As I looked around at these children my heart completely went into pieces. It is SO sad. SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO sad. So sad. They have no belongings of their own. They have no parents to brush their hair, tell them stories, laugh at their antics, become overjoyed by them...no one to delight in them. They have caretakers who come in daily to cook and clean and house parents who are at this time very weary and over burdened.
I also have very little doubt that other than the once of month visits they receive from the church that supports them that they get no other hugs and love throughout that month. I have all these thoughts running through my head.... I have this huge knot in my heart....seriously in the middle of my heart that is tight. I can't breath. I do not think this is necessarily a normal reaction .... I don't know what my problem is but I do know that just like last time it will take me some time to acclimate back into my world and life. Right now I just keep seeing little brown faces and outstretched arms and I can't see how on earth I can just keep going when I want to turn around go back there ...

Going to Mexico!

So we are traveling to the orphanage in Los Palomas, Mexico this week. We have to stay in a hotel or motel in Deming, NM because by the time we arrive, its dark and we do not want to cross the border in the dark and plus we will be traveling with a trailer behind us full of supplies and food for the orphanage that we drop off actually in Deming....there, we reload the SUV with what we can take in one trip because otherwise it would be very difficult to get the trailer cross the border. We have a drop of spot and then others or us go back and forth to transport it in one vehicle across the border. Busy packing up all our stuff into ONE suitcase! :)


This little rascal kept me up till wee hours... I have no idea what he was planning on doing..but, my Doberman had him trapped in the rafters and her barking was loud enough and fierce enough to make me feel rather certain there was something going on and sure enough...Mr. Racoon was trapped up there. I had to wander out into the very very very cold and chilled night to get Roxanne (Dobie) into the basement so the raccoon could be free. Finally I snuggled back up in bed and eventually fell asleep.

And its only 8 pm but I'm off to get Annah to bed and do my "Absolutely Nasty Suduko" Puzzle. I've done lots of Sudoku but the ones by Frank Longo/Mensa are really really challenging.

Nighty night!

Peter & Judas

I really really really love studying about the apostles. Mostly because they were so human. There have been times as a mature Christian...and I do consider myself a mature Christian...not just in age but in my knowledge and walk with God. Therefore, when I mess up... when I act very very very wrong... or I wrong someone... or anything of the human nature side that causes me to be utterly shocked at myself or hang my head in temporary shame... I like to remember that the road traveled before me was walked by some of the most mightiest men of God who not only experienced miracles and wonder and the very presence of God, but we also know by written account that they to fell down, doubted, did wrong things, made wrong choices. David....as an example...to whom God said was a man after his own heart... had a man murdered and stole his wife and when he became aware at just how wrong that was...he was greatly grieved and he did suffer the consequences of that but he went on with God, he continued to move forward and be blessed by God and used by God.

There have been times when I have been just completely shocked at myself. I have stood back in aghast at myself and my actions. I've reacted to things that hurt others greatly. During those times when I have been so foolish and all the while still a 'mature' Christian.... I believe someone is mature in Christ when they have walked and they know and they are very aware of the Word, of how to walk, beyond milk.... there was a time when I was 'new' and I didn't know better in a lot of things but by now....I know. I know better....

....so anyways, during those times when I am just shy of kicking myself or beating my head against the wall, I remember Peter and Judas. I remember both had equal opportunity during their walk with Christ. They both saw. They both heard. They experienced the same thing and they both, not exactly equally but pretty close....both pretty much denied Christ...one sold him out and one flat out denied even knowing him. Judas sold him out, Peter denied.
But the difference is HUGE... the difference is that Judas hung himself and Peter went on to do mighty things for Christ. It was Peter who preached to the masses in Jerusalem on the day of Pentecost and it is his message which is recorded in the New Testament of the Bible, the book of Acts, chapter 2. In fact, much is written about the apostle Peter in the first 12 chapters of the book of Acts in the New Testament. It was Peter who healed a man over 40 years of age who had been crippled from birth with but the words, "Silver and Gold I do not have, but what I have I give to you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk."

Both men were greatly tormented and grieved in great distress over their actions... but Judas hung himself...Peter wept and he wept bitterly the Word tells us but..... he went on stronger.
So if you find yourself flat on your face .... get up, dust yourself off.... weep bitterly if you need to...but get going stronger. :)

Happy Day, Happy New Year, Happy Happy Happy

Happy 25th Alan Dean! :)

Sadly, for his birthday, as he and another American were out and about in Guatemala, they were suddenly overtook by 20 men who robbed them of their wallets. Alan said it was very quick, very sudden, no one was hurt.
However, his money, bank card, Social Security card and Panama residence Visa was all in his wallet.
He said they spent hours looking in the trashes for their wallets as typically only the money is removed but they never recovered their wallets, however, they did find someone elses! :) That will be a thankful person! :)

Everything, of course, will work out and be okay. We are Happy and thankful neither he nor David were injured in anyway!

Below is a YouTube of his life from birth to 24 !